FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Cuvee Coffee to Acquire the Letter E and Therefore...Everything.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Cuvee Coffee to Acquire the Letter "E". and Therefore..."Everything".

Austin, Texas - October 30, 2015 - This morning, Cuvee Coffee, the Austin, TX.-based coffee roaster and retailer, announced its acquisition of the letter “E” in agreement with Sesame Street, New York-based children’s television program. The innovator of children’s educational broadcasting will continue its normal usage of the famed vowel, under a new royalty agreement with Cuvee.

Cuvee CEO, Mike McKim says motivation for the purchase was simple, "I don’t fully understand the transitive property, but it seemed that with ownership of E came ownership of anything using E. Can someone explain it again?”

“Cuvee will now have 20% ownership of ‘everything’.”

Big Bird, who brokered the deal, was unavailable for comment. Sesame Street’s CFO, The Count, issued the following statement, “This deal was brought to you by the dollar number, 150 million. AH AH AH!”

Under this new agreement, Cuvee will possess ownership of all subsequent words using the letter E, including owning 40% of “Peets” and 33% of “Coffee”. The deal is being proclaimed as one the best business ventures of all time. Cuvee has already recouped its investment in the letter, as it now owns 1/5th of all “Money”.

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